Event

The Vent - 4/21/13

featuring:

S A N D Y S T E C
"Thunder From Down Under: What Happens When a Single Girl from Milpitas has a Personal Encounter with Australia's Hottest Export"
^ ^ ^
Suddenly, I was in a casino elevator with a male stripper's tongue down my throat. I didn't get it. Wasn't he gay? Did I even remember how to have sex? Does he know I have a stolen buffet muffin in my purse?

K A Y D E M A R T I N I
"Minnesota: Why can't you warm up to me?"
^ ^ ^
Rookie teacher seeks friendship & love in Le Sueur County, Minnesota. The staff is a tight clique and, through her unique fashion choices, Kay makes bold moves to gain acceptance. The town is unprepared for her white go-go boots and her over-use of paisley. She slips into a lonely, desperate peppermint schnapps funk, until she learns about the annual Christmas Faculty Party down at the Beer & Bait Shop. It doesn't end well.

A N D R E A C A R L A M I C H A E L S
"50 is the new 70"
^ ^ ^
"Excuse me, no disrespect, no disrespect maam, but I'm really into older women...are you married?" was he really talking to me? Did that line actually work for him? Andrea Carla Michaels shares the daily humiliations of aging and what we can do about them.

E N Z O L O M B A R D
"Napolean Avenue"
^ ^ ^
In the tiny town of Candor, Louisiana in Cajun country, mama is being lifted onto an air mattress in the back of a U-Haul van, blind and paralyzed. After 20 years, she knows she will never return again, and her parting words are "just get me the fuck out of this shithole." Picking up exactly ten years after Enzo's earlier play "Love Humiliation & Karaoke" (directed by W. Kamau Bell) left off, Napolean Avenue changes venue from San Francisco's Tenderloin to Cajun country and the Bouligny plantation district of New Orleans.

M O S A M A X W E L L - S M I T H
"I Have My Mother's Hair (in a Margarine Tub in the Closet)"
^ ^ ^
What better way to deter a bully with cat allergies than to present her with a pillow passive-aggressively stuffed with feline fur? And hey! Reduce, reuse, recycle; who says you can't be green and give someone her due in one big hairy swoop? That's what my mother taught me anyway.