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Community Grief Workshop and Ritual

Sacred Dwelling
Oakland, CA

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One of the worst things we suffer from is privatized pain.
-Francis Weller

Pain is a sign we are really alive. Our predominate Western culture teaches us to move on quickly, avoid our feelings, and live in isolation and fear of rejection. Humans have been grieving in community throughout history. Only in the past hundred years or so have people become isolated in their expressions of grief. Certain depths of emotion are only accessible to us collectively. Grief rituals offer us the necessary container and connection for us to move through our deepest feelings. Together, in such a potent, sociopolitical time, we will create a strong container to hold us as we grieve losses of people, pets, dreams, relationships, identities, land, abilities, health, configurations of family, connection with our Ancestors, Mother Earth,Spirit, and more. This work will make us stronger, resilient, and open space for joy.

Our day together will consist of a morning workshop exploring grief and an afternoon ritual inspired by the Dagara people of Burkina Faso, as taught to us by our beloved teacher, Sobonfu Somé. Sobonfu died in January and we will be remembering and commemorating one our our newest ancestors. This ritual was gifted by the Dagara people to Western culture. As white people who feel concerned with our culture's tendency to appropriate, we've put great thought and care into the idea of holding and African ritual. We are committed to giving credit and honor to the Dagara for this sacred gift. This workshop includes the offering of Dagara grief teachings and singing a Dagara song as a part of the ritual.

The heart that breaks open can contain the whole universe.
-Joanna Macy

Bios:
Therese Noel Allen, MFT is a queer psychotherapist, expressive arts therapist, Generative Somatics practitioner, artist, and eco-spiritualist. Therese has a private practice in Downtown Oakland focusing on queer and transgender folks, survivors of sexual assault and trauma, sexuality, and liberation. http://thereseallenmft.com/

Maggie Weber-Striplin is a queer sole proprietor of The Sacred Hearth, which dedicated to helping people become who they already are through the roles of Reiki practitioner, full spectrum doula, and grief work. Maggie has been immersed in grief work for the past year, studying and grieving with Sobonfu Somé, Francis Weller, Sacred Future (Maria Owl Gutierrez and Mike Shea.) and Daniel Foor. She is answering the call to forget your perfect offering and to offer a living process of individual and community transformation.

REFUND POLICY: Please note that we are unfortunately unable to offer refunds once a donation has been offered. We are however happy to change the name on your registration if you would like to find someone to take your place.

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Very dear group, It is with a tender heart that we circle back to check-in on you. You did brave, moving, powerful, and vulnerable work. You made yourself available to movement, growth, connection, release and transformation. We want you to know how proud of you we are and how honored we both felt by your trust. We wanted to find out how you are doing since the ritual, to offer a gentle reminder of the integration guidelines (below), which may continue to be helpful today, resources (also below), as promised, and to invite you to let us know if you would like to be a part of the on-going phone/email list if you didn't write your name on it already. Finally, we wanted to offer a reminder to find a place, if you haven't already, to put your grief. Give it to a special tree, or a plant, your altar, a candle, the ocean; wherever feels right to you. The earth knows what to do with it. Our bodies are not meant to hold it alone. With compassion and courage, Therese & Maggie Community Grief Workshop & Ritual Integration Guidelines Be kind with yourself. You have been through a process that is still growing in you. Open to a new relationship with these pieces of yourself. Take care of your body. Drink electrolytes and plenty of water. This will help you to metabolize the experience on a cellular level, as well as prevent dehydration and migraines. Ritual work and work with higher energy frequencies can deplete electrolytes in the physical body. Skip numbing substances. Alcohol, cannabis, sugar, movies, etc. You will reap the benefits of the work by allowing yourself to feel your feelings, rather than avoiding. Cleanse with salt water. Take a bath with epsom salts or jump in the ocean. This will cleanse you energetically and physically. Rest. Go to bed and get plenty of rest. Slow down. Be gentle and spacious with your time. Allow yourself to take your time. We suggest not having plans the evening of the ritual, other than those in the guidelines. Go for a walk on the earth. Feel her support as she holds you up. Take the next day off. If you are able, take the next day to be with your experience. If you have children, we encourage arranging for childcare whenever possible. Hold your story close. Often people you live with and/or love will want to know your story. How was it? What happened? It is important to know your story is sacred, and in many ways, beyond words. It can be important to have time to feel into what the experience means to you prior to attempting to describe it to someone else. One thing you might say is, Thanks for asking. I am finding that my experience is still growing in me. Im not sure that I am ready to share it yet. What would be helpful for now is... Use discretion when sharing your story. We encourage you to be in choice about whom and when you share your story. Pay attention to your sense about another persons ability to really listen. Do they have an agenda? Notice what part(s) of the story you want and dont want to share. Maybe there are aspects of your story that just get to be yours and are never shared. Access your resources. What are your resources and who are your allies (internal and external) that can help you integrate your experience? Your garden? The forest? Your altar? Your best friend who wants to help you grow? Your partner who is willing to let you be on your own journey? You may choose to create a sacred space (in- or outdoors) to take your grief to the next time it arises. Write. You can give yourself prompts if it feels useful. I remember, I feel. You may choose to create a grief support group and meet or Skype regularly to share your writings. Resource List Websiteswww.sobonfu.com http://www.francisweller.net/ http://malidoma.com/ http://giftsofgrief.com/ http://www.sacredfuture.org/community-grief-ritual.html BooksFalling Out of Grace: Meditations on Loss, Healing and Wisdom by Sobonfu Some The Wild Edge of Sorrow: Rituals of Renewal and the Sacred Work of Grief by Francis Weller Die Wise: A manifesto for Sanity and Soul by Stephen Jenkinson FilmsGriefwalker, 2012 starring Stephen Jenkinson

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Sacred Dwelling (View)
1028 59th Street
Oakland, CA 94608
United States

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